Ever had this thought on a Sunday night?
“I’m the worst. I had this whole weekend and instead of cleaning out my basement, running errands, and getting a jump start on this week’s presentation, I sat my lazy butt on the couch and binged watched Top Chef. I’m such a failure!”
If that’s you, let me tell you something.
Women and shame is a deeply rooted pattern.
There’s this “there’s something wrong with me” story that shame is responsible for.
We in some way or another see ourselves as flawed.
Based on societal upbringing, expectations, media, cultural history, and probably part of our DNA, women are simply hard on themselves.
We place a high emphasis on our appearance, roles, and energy.
This ongoing inner conflict results in a massive energy drainer.
Unfortunately this not only impacts own confidence, but our energy is passed on to our children, team members, colleagues, and family.
Bottom line: We have got to put an end to feeling shame.
A practice I love and I try so hard to remind myself of when I’m self-berating is to ask: would I say this to someone else?
Would I call up my daughter or mom or colleague or friend and say:
- You’re so fat.
- You’re so dumb.
- Just give up – you’re never going to get this right.
- You’re such a failure.
- You’re just a bad mom.
- You can’t hack it as a business owner.
No, never!
Our worst critics are always ourselves.
Don’t be your own worst enemy.
If you wouldn’t say it to someone else, don’t say it to yourself.
This is your in-the-moment strategy to get you out of your own self-sabotaging nonsense.
Amazing how that small shift can be so powerful in your mental talk and your emotional well-being.
Which has a snowball effect on how you’re showing up for the people and projects you want to put your energy and effort towards.
Shaming yourself into thinking or believing you’re not doing enough is never going to help you move forward.
Catch yourself in negative self talk and change your narrative.
You deserve nothing less.
If you’d love help in changing habits that sabotage your growth, book a time for us to chat. Few things light me up more than helping women feel awesome. Schedule a time here.
Leave a Reply