I recently had a coaching consult with an amazing law firm owner.
She loves the program and believes in me but she had one big hesitation.
Trusting herself.
She’s sure she’ll let herself down…again.
“I’ve tried this 100 times. All the tools, all the systems. Why will it be different this time?”
Her belief: “I am the problem.”
It breaks my heart when smart and talented women feel defeated because they’ve lost confidence in their abilities.
My number one goal for my clients is to feel successful.
Use these 4 reasons to squash self-defeating beliefs that make YOU the problem.
#1: Your past results don’t determine your future ones.
Think about something you failed at dozens of times until it finally worked.
What comes to mind for me is my husband.
I’d been dating since college, and I didn’t meet him until I was 30.
I was so over dating – in fact I blew him off at first. (He loves to tell this story).
But he was persistent, we went out, and it was an instant connection.
My best friend didn’t meet her husband until 40. She’s been happily married for 10 years.
Your previous outcomes do not dictate your future ones.
Maybe you weren’t ready for change or improvement at one time of your life, maybe the timing wasn’t right, or maybe you just didn’t have the right solution.
But know that this time you have exactly what you need.
What if I’d given up just before that first date?
#2: Your motivation changes.
Only two things motivate us to change: pain or pleasure.
Maybe months or years have gone by of you feeling exhausted or struggling, and your pain is greater than it used to be.
Or maybe now you have a family or a bigger team and you’re clearer on how you want to live your life. Your desire for pleasure is greater.
When your why deepens you’re more likely to make changes that push you out of your comfort zone and stay on track.
Your desire and commitment to change NOW is far greater than in the past.
#3: True partnership works.
You can have amazing girlfriends or colleagues as accountability partners.
But they won’t put that friendship at risk by pushing you too far.
Nor do they have the time or bandwidth to figure out all your roadblocks.
I dig deep with my clients to get to the root of their issues like fear, lack of boundaries, or perfectionism.
Then we customize systems, routines, and expectations. We even role play.
This is where true collaboration comes in.
Which brings me to…#4.
Investing money gets results.
We are least accountable to ourselves.
We are not super accountable to friends.
We are most accountable to someone we are paying.
I’ve tried giving up sugar for years. I’m only now seeing success because I’m paying for accountability.
Knowing someone you trust is checking in on the regular motivates you to follow through on your plan.
This created a new habit in my life. One I’ll have even when our partnership ends.
I can’t tell you how many clients started making changes before we kicked off our sessions simply because they made the investment.
Investing in yourself is a next level commitment to your goals.
You have so much value to contribute to your work, community, family, life and to the world.
You are primed to make an impact.
But if you stay stuck in this pattern of belief that YOU have been the problem and will continue to be the problem then guess what…you’ll be right. The problem will be you.
I believe in you and know that YOU are not the issue.
You can get anything you want, in your business and life, when you have the right guidance and accountability by your side.
This is my life’s work so of course I’d love to be that person, coach, confidante, and catalyst for you.
But if it’s not me, there’s someone else for you, and that’s okay too.
Either way make believing in YOU a priority.
Every success story starts with a belief.
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